The Secret To Making Habits Stick That Nobody Tells You
What is the advice you hear most often?
Just be yourself.
Just go to the gym.
Just start meditating.
Just start reading bro.
And what happens when you do all of them. At some point, you leave those habits.
If you’re reading this, I bet you have been there where you started a good habit but after a few months, you left it. And maybe you don’t even know, why you left that habit.
Let me tell you why I was inconsistent with my habits.
When I’d start any positive habit. I’d create a box in my head and I’ll tick that habit only when I hit my personal record. For example:- I’d start meditating and would consider that I successfully meditated only when I meditate for 30 mins.
If I failed in doing that I’d consider myself a failure. And it’s obvious I’d fail at doing that most of the time. So, Due to negative reinforcement of being a failure, I’d leave that habit.
How to make habits stick?
Actually, there are 2 ways. Let’s go over them one by one:-
1. Lower The Bar
This is gonna harm your ego. You might think you’re a strong person, you can probably lift 10kgs on your first day at your gym. But let me break it to you. You can’t.
So, say fuck you to your ego and lower your bar.
If you do one push-up today, that’s fucking progress. If you do one second of meditation, that’s fucking progress, if you write about 1 thing that you’re grateful for, that’s fuking progress.
What you’re aiming for is validation, the validation you’ll get when you say to people that you lifted 10 kgs. But, what lowering your bar will give you is real consistency. You’d become consistent with all the positive habits because obviously, you can do all of them.
2. Celebrate Small Wins
If you’re like most people. You read the previous para and thought you were much better than this. And that’s not you. That’s your ego speaking.
Celebrating your small wins will give you positive reinforcement, that small validation that you need from yourself for doing good activities. Feel good that you did better than yesterday. If you allow yourself to feel good about your progress and stop chasing perfection.
You’d become so much more consistent at the gym, in meditation, in journalling, in reading. If you’d stop focusing on doing them for hours and put your attention to the fact that you’re fucking doing it.
Think about it. You’re a person who has never done exercise, who has never done meditation, who has never read a book. And now, because you’ve lowered your bars you’re doing it every day. You are so much better than you were a month ago. Be proud of yourself.
